It’s All About The Pastor
It is only appropriate that my first recap post be about my favorite Bravo show, Vanderpump Rules. I also appreciate the producers for bringing back season 6’s infamous “It’s Not About the Pasta” tagline. Can we all agree that it MOST definitely was about the pasta? For those of you not familiar, there was a rumor that ‘pasta’ was a code name for a white powdery illegal substance (even though several of the cast denied this). But I think it’s true, because let’s be real, these skinny bitches aren’t eating any pasta.
I need to use this sidebar to reveal another unpopular opinion: James Kennedy is the hero we all need in this tumultuous time in our country. His manic, offensive outbursts bring me a joy I never knew I needed but have always craved. He is an oracle into the future, an enigma if you will, who must be protected at all costs. I know i't’s coming, but I am not looking forward to the day he quits drinking and stops eating ‘pasta’.
This episode started out with LVP waking up to numerous DMs and tweets regarding Jax and Brittany’s 15th century pastor. For those of you living under a rock, let me catch you up. Their pastor tweeted incredibly hateful, homophobic comments that were uncovered back in January of 2019. Fast forward four months, more tweets were exposed days before Jax and Brittany’s wedding which prompted the Twitterverse to bombard and question LGBTQ ally, Lisa Vanderpump. Lisa was obviously very upset by this and insisted that Brittany and Jax hire a new pastor. This is where things got a little dicey so buckle up.
Let me start by saying Ariana and Tom were the overall MVP’s of this episode and Jax and Brittany need to CHILL. THE. EFF. OUT. At Peter’s birthday party (why is this dude even still on the show), Sandoval confronts Jax and calmly asks him why they waited for Lisa to intervene before firing their pastor. This causes Jax to FREAK OUT and act completely offended by Sandoval’s very reasonable inquiry. Jax then goes over to Brittany and instigates a larger fight which quickly spirals out of control in typical VPR fashion. Meanwhile, Brittany is already having a mental breakdown in the corner because of mean comments on her Instagram by trolls making fun of her princess-themed bridal party. Oh, and this was right after Brittany announced that my childhood crush, Lance Bass, offered to officiate their wedding.
Brittany, can we try to have a little self awareness, please? After Jax caused all this drama, I was really hoping Sandavol would punch him in the face, most likely prompting Jax’s FOURTH nose job. Yes, you heard that right. I still can’t afford my first one, but I’m not bitter.
I truly thought that the rest of the crew would side with Sandoval, but instead, everyone turned on him. Stassi, you usually do no wrong in my eyes, but I think you were out of line on this one. It kind of felt like you were jumping on the bandwagon, maybe since you’re still pissed about what went down at your book signing. Also, I know you were trying to be funny, but I did not quite get your Game of Thrones reference. #sorrynotsorry. You’re still my favorite though.
In the end, I am truly confused as to why everyone feels the need to defend Brittany over everything and everyone. Frankly, it’s getting really annoying and there NEEDS to be a new plot line ASAP. Brittany has made her bed by forgiving Jax over and over again, and now she needs to deal with the HOT mess.
To quote the wise words of poet, Sir Thomas Sandoval: “It’s dangerous to have a group of friends where people are not allowed to speak up when they feel like something’s wrong.”
I love some old fashioned civil discourse, so feel free to comment below if you disagree! Or if you agree. Whatever your sweet heart desires.
